| tourist: | could you give us directions to Olive Garden? |
| new yorker: | no, but i could give you directions to an actual Italian restaurant lol |
| tourist: | oh you think youre clever??? |
| new yorker: | what |
| tourist: | i'm going to meet my dying neice and she happens to love olive garden so her whole family is going to eat with her so she'll have a few moments of happiness |
| new yorker: | oh... oh god i'm so sor |
| tourist: | no shut the fuck up you piece of shit. i'll find it myself |
| the tourist drives off and the new yorker is left to think about his life choices and his decision to be a giant condescending asshole |
(Source: thusspokezorathustra)
Mermaids: The Body Found, airs tonight (5/27/12) at 9pm E/P on Animal Planet. Be sure to check-in on getglue.com to unlock this exclusive, limited time sticker! Message me your thoughts about it when it’s over! In the meantime, have a beautiful day everyone. The sun’s out and shining where I am :)
TYLER AND I ARE WATCHING THIS SHIT TONIGHT
Lockdown; Taub & Foreman gets stoned on vicodin
“Crocket and Tubbs”
(Source: them-good-old-boys)
I don’t understand why it’s socially unacceptable for me to just say “Excuse me, my uterus is currently weeping tears of blood for my unconceived child.”
Talking about my bleeding uterus on Tumblr somehow makes it better
